Tin Foil Hat Man Says “The End is Near”

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Good morning foolish earthlings. As you know tomorrow is the end of the world. It’s all over the Internet, so wake up and smell the freshly ground coffee. Trust me, I know, no need to even consider the alternative, even though the ‘mainstream media’ tells us otherwise. This is the truth, and you have been warned. Who are you going to believe, knowledgeable scientists, your government, or those so called ‘experts’ at NASA? Ha, they’re all big fat liars! Take it from me the man with the tin-foil hat and your good buddy Red Elvis (where ever he may be). My advice, enjoy your last day on earth, have a brownie, or as Marie Antoinette once said ‘let them eat cake.’ Yes my finger is pointing sky ward and my face is serious, because I see what you don’t — a giant muffin ready to come crashing down on our measly little planet and turn it into toast (yummy!). So who are you going to believe all those people with fancy degrees and the best technology money can buy, or a bunch of us dedicated loons on YouTube! I’m going to do something I’ve never done before, make croissants, because I’ve heard that it’s hard and I like to challenge myself. I’m already ‘resting and shaping’ my dough and preparing my butter layer–2 whole days of effort, and soon will enjoy the fruits of my labor, these tasty buttery treats, eaten before I’m a slab of charcoal…

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