Not Really But I was Busy at the Monkey Training School

last-1I’m ten days behind. As usual, I’m always the last to know. I’m not slow or anything (I mean in the head). I just can’t be bothered with certain formalities, like remembering dates, or birthdays, or hours, holidays etc. Everyday is the same here in Thailand. You get up and it’s hot. You eat and it’s hot. You go to bed, and you guessed it–It’s hot. Hooray for me I made it through one more term at school. The last week I thought someone was playing a trick on me–so much work to finish and I dreamed that they said “forget it!!! No break for you! You’re working sucker.” It was just a dream, and the last week my uncle was here from Oman, an even hotter country then this, and they don’t eat pork so it’s like 50 dollars a pound, so we spent the week eating ribs and pork things, and all kinds of oinky food –which I eat almost everyday, but he and his wife couldn’t get enough of it. But what the hell does this have to do with a monkey training school? Nothing, but after we ate, we had to do something, and as a person who doesn’t think much about things I saw a picture of it and thought it looked like a cool idea. Imagine, a school for monkeys, and I was thinking–How different could it be then the place I go to every day. I mean I kind of work at a monkey training school, right? The money’s were given food for performing tasks. OK, I give what we call ‘magic points,’ for answering (really just speaking) questions, so it’s a bit like holding up a banana while 50 screaming Thai kids shout at me, wanting said banana or in my case “magic points.’ My aunt didn’t like it because the monkeys were in cages–but look at the sign I said, they let them out in the evening, they only keep them in the cages (I guessed) for insurance purposes. I mean who wants to leave Thailand with the memory of getting half your face ripped off by some money. That wouldn’t be a very good thing to show, or tell the people back home. And hell, the monkey’s did some cool tricks. One of them could star in the NBA, I mean what a free throw that dude had! They could ride pushbikes as well, impressive! And one of them could count and held up the answer for all of us to see, something some of my kids at school can’t even do. So, the training school gets a bad rap, but for me only because it felt like another day at the office. monkey training

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